Pokémon Black and White introduced gamers into a fifth production of Pokémon, bringing the entire amount of pocket monsters to just beneath a billion. With so many Pokémon available, how is a coach supposed to learn which ones would be the best? Simple: I am going to let you know which ones will be the ideal. So grab a pen and some paper — you’re going to want to take notes.
I’m obviously a Pokémon expert, as evident by my magnificent analysis of a number of the new Pokémon in the first Black and White. However, because I’ve yet to perform Version 2, I requested my fellow editor Kyle to offer me his selections of the best Generation V Pokémon, so I might offer my professional assessment of these to your edification. However, it didn’t take me long to realize that his selections are horrible, so after assessing his pathetic lineup, I’m also supplying what are the real best Gen V Pokémon.
Kyle’s Horrendous Picks:
Kyle explained Tepig was his starter Pokémon, so I’m guessing he believes Pignite is awesome because of his own silly, sentimental attachment. There are two problems with this. To begin with, Oshawott is clearly the best beginning Pokémon out of B&W (though Tepig is still superior than the snooty jerkbag Snivy). Second, why can he pick Pignite rather than Emboar? He probably was not good enough to evolve his Pignite into its final shape. Regardless, Pignite is still pretty good.by link pokemon black 2 exp patch website
I made fun of Watchog within my prior analysis — specifically, I questioned just how good of a lookout Watchog could be if he got captured by a coach at the first location. Especially Kyle! Watchog does seem unbelievably pissed off, however, so he can probably intimidate weenie Pokémon such as Deerling.
I am seriously starting to wonder Kyle’s Pokémon-choosing skills. Herdier is not a Pokémon. He’s a Scottish soldier. Guess what happens in the event you try and make a couple of Scottish Terriers battle each other? You go to jail for dog fighting, that is what.
Official Pokémon Rating: N/A
Official Dog Rating: two
Tirtouga ends up being better than most of Kyle’s choices, but I have to question: Why do we need another turtle Pokémon once we’ve already got Squirtle? I get that Tirtouga really is a Water/Rock hybrid Pokémon, but it still seems like he is horning in on Squirtle’s game, and Squirtle is straight up O.G. — I certainly wouldn’t mess with him.
Official Pokémon Rating: 6 (Squirtle’s Official Pokémon Rating: 10)
Kyle clearly didn’t read my past Pokémon analysis, since Musharna is another disturbing selection that I already took to action. Here is what I wrote before:
“My God, that Pokémon is still a fetus! What type of sicko will make a fetus fight?”
Clearly we finally have the solution: Kyle is that type of sicko.
Coming Up : Longer lousy picks by Kyle…
What’s with Kyle’s obsession with Pokémon who have not even had a chance to fully shape yet? I think that it’s clear what’s going on here: Kyle isn’t very good at Pokémon, so that he chooses the weakest creatures he can see in order to get an excuse when he or she wins. In that sense, Solosis is a wonderful choice.
Official Pokémon Rating: 0
Official Pokémon Rating For Individuals Who Wish To Reduce 10
Yamask? More like Yakiddingme? This Pokémon’s full persona is built around its mask, which it just holds with its own tail. What do Yamasks even do with their masks? According to the Pokédex,”Occasionally they look at it and shout.” That really doesn’t seem helpful in any respect! Yamasks are even worse compared to evolved type, Cofagrigus, which we all know is only a sarcophagus with wacky legs and arms.
I’ve zero issue with this choice.
Apparently, Deino thinks he’s a member of The Beatles. I never thought I would sort this sentence, but this dragon needs to receive a haircut. But a mop-top dragon remains technically a dragon, so he’s got that going for him. Additionally, Deino is a Dark/Dragon hybridvehicle, which is better than a Rainbow/Dragon hybrid, or Candycorn/Dragon hybridvehicle, or anything other stupid Pokémon types you can find. But, Deino can evolve into Hydreigon, in which point his front legs become two more heads. That’s far cooler than Deino, Kyle.
Hey, what do you know? Kyle finally chose a cool Pokémon! Granted, a blindfolded monkey could’ve chosen better Pokémon compared to just my fellow editor did, yet this selection (almost) makes up for it. Beartic is categorized as a Freezing Pokémon, who’s actually made out of ice, and his degree one ability is called Superpower. That’s correct, Beartic starts with Superpower.
More than anything else, I am simply impressed that Kyle didn’t pick Beartic’s unevolved kind, Cubchoo (the snot-dripping teddy on the right).
Official Pokémon Rating: 9
Now that we’ve suffered through Kyle’s horrendous picks, let’s look at what exactly are in fact the ideal Pokémon of Black and White Model 2, as picked by a professional…
The Actual Greatest Pokémon:
I wasn’t kidding when I said Oshawott was the clear choice for a starting Pokémon, and Samurott is the main reason . Oshawott’s goofy seashell (which still kind of seems like a wang to me) even evolves to awesome Shell Armor, as well as judging by Samurott’s pecs, this Pokémon is now torn. Need further proof? Samurott’s species is recorded as Formidable Pokémon. ’nuff said.
Simisage is a Thorn Monkey species of Pokémon, and judging by his image, he clearly knows how to rock. He has got an Elvis-like coif, a barbed tail that he attacks his opponents with, and big, funny monkey ears. Simisage is so cool that he’s giving himself the thumbs-up, which can be well deserved.
Official Pokémon Rating: 10 And Also A Thumbs-Up
I’m pretty sure Gurdurr is the strongest Pokémon in all of Pokéworld. It’s categorized as a Pokémon, it is a Fighting-type Pokémon, also its skills are Guts, Sheer Force, and Iron Fist. Also, it’s holding a sneak beam over its head! Look at all of its bulging muscles — Gurdurr is so strong it is kind of gross. In case you need more proof, the Pokédex clarifies Gurdurr as follows:
“This Pokémon is so muscle and firmly built that even a group of wrestlers could not make it budge an inch”
Let us watch your Musharna stand around that, Kyle.
I didn’t even understand Pokémon wear clothes, however Throh is wearing a gi, and he’s a black belt to boot. Much like Gurdurr, Throh is additionally a straight-up Fighting-type Pokémon, along with his species is now Judo Pokémon. Throhs are so powerful they don’t even evolve — that is correct, not evolution can improve them.
Like I said, I’ve zero issue with this pick. Minccino is adorable!
Official Pokémon Rating: 10
Coming Up Next: Five Amazing Pokémon…
Here’s another heavy hitter that Kyle totally passed up. Darmanitan is classified as a Blazing Pokémon, that explains why its eyebrows are on fire. As if a flame ape isn’t frightening enough, here is Darmanitan’s Pokédex description:
“Its internal flame burns 2,500º F, which makes enough power that it can destroy a dump truck with a single punch.”
2,500º F will be the melting point of steel. Steel. Not even the Terminator can withstand molten steel! Now that’s a Pokémon!
Official Pokémon Rating: Stronger Than Arnold Schwarzenegger
Should you ever ran to a Galvantula, you may just dismiss it like a semi-creepy bug. It could be the last mistake you ever make; as soon as you turned around, it would shoot electric webs from its fangs to jolt you into submission. Then it would eat you. Do not believe me that Nintendo would accept this kind of menacing Pokémon? On the Pokédex entrance:
“They employ a electrically charged internet to trap their prey. Although it’s immobilized by shock, they consume it.”
Notice, Galvantula does not just consume its electrified foes — it consumes themlike it’s no matter. A Xenomorph would shudder and run away from one of these things.
Official Pokémon Rating: 10
Let’s be honest: Golurk is basically The Iron Giant, by that one picture whose title I can not recall. It might not be all that original, but it does not make Golurk any less badass. Golurk is classified as a Automaton Pokémon — even for those who don’t know,”Automaton” is Latin for”Giant robot that destroys everything in its path.” Its Pokédex entry makes it seem even cooler:
“It strikes across the sky at Mach speeds. Removing the seal onto its torso makes its internal energy go out of hands .”
What of Kyle’s Pokémon wants to go up against that?
Official Pokémon Rating: Supersonic Robot Bomb
This robot bug may not look as scary as some of the other Pokémon on this record, but he’s got quite the backstory. Genesect is a Paleozoic Pokémon which was originally dwelling 300 million years ago, as it was”feared since the most powerful of predators,” according to the Pokédex. Then it was bolstered by Team Plasma, making it much stronger by adding a cannon to its back. Quick side note: if you ever decide to use science to resurrect an ancient being feared because of its unparalleled hunting abilities, don’t give it a cannon.
Predictably, Genesect broke from the lab and has never been seen again. To make things worse, its own cannon could be outfitted with four distinct drives, endowing it with all the forces of all four different kinds of regular Pokémon.
Nobody knows the story behind Genesect’s name; lovers believe it means”genesis bug” or”genetic insect” I have my own concept: In Japanesethis frightful creature is truly called Genosect — I’m guessing the actual significance of its name is”genocide bug.”
Official Pokémon Rating: Genocide Bug
There’s not much to mention, besides that Thundurus ain’t screwing around. Thundurus is a mythical Pokémon, and is classified as a Bolt Strike Pokémon. All his skills sound amazing: Uproar, Astonish, Thundershock, Terrible Plot. . .Okay, I don’t know about that last one, but the others are pretty cool.